The latest AP Poll suggests that GOP vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin now has one remaining demographic that overwhelmingly supports her candidacy. While only 23 percent of the general electorate now feel that she is qualified for the VP role, 93 percent of dudes with mullets have the fullest confidence in her abilities.
"That there Sarah chick is one hot momma, you know what I'm sayin?" stated visibly inebriated Billy John Cook, 23, of Deerfield, Arkansas. "I don't never remember having a lady like that to vote fer. Most of the womens 'round here don't even have all their teeth or nuthin!. Dang, where'd I put down my beer at? Did'tcha take it, ya bastard?!"
Dudes with mullets tend to share Governor Palin's views on many issues, including guns, hunting, NASCAR and beer. Lester Bob Wilcox, 29, of Eunice, Missouri feels Palin connects with him on a personal level: "I heard her say one time that she's all about the 'Joe six-packs' out there. Well, I tell you what Miss Palin, I gotta six pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon back in my trailer. Why don't ya stop by some time, we'll drink some cold ones, and I'll show ya my huntin' rifle collection. Then I'd show ya my OTHER gun - oh yeah, ya know what I'm talkin' about!"
With the election only days away, it remains to be seen whether dudes with mullets will have any impact on the presidential race. "I don't know about that McCain guy, he reminds me of old Henry down over at the Pickins farm. That bastard would shoot at us with his squirrel rifle whenever we'd ride our ATVs over his land," said Joe 'Slim' Johnson, 35, of Monroe, Tennessee. "If it were just McCain runnin', I could care less 'bout this whole thing. But that Sarah Palin is real excitin'. I'm votin' now for sure. Any woman who shoots wolves and goes to NASCAR rallies and has a hot body is my kinda woman."
While Palin's support amongst dudes with mullets is very strong, voter turnout has historically been poor in this core constituency. "My parole officer said I can't vote no more, on account of me being convicted of meth production and all," said Ryan Joe Stone, 39, of Hillsdale, Kentucky. "That's a dang shame that I can't vote fer her. I heard from my cousin Kevin that she's in one of them adult movies made by that guy who runs Hustler. Man, I wanna see that."
"That there Sarah chick is one hot momma, you know what I'm sayin?" stated visibly inebriated Billy John Cook, 23, of Deerfield, Arkansas. "I don't never remember having a lady like that to vote fer. Most of the womens 'round here don't even have all their teeth or nuthin!. Dang, where'd I put down my beer at? Did'tcha take it, ya bastard?!"
Dudes with mullets tend to share Governor Palin's views on many issues, including guns, hunting, NASCAR and beer. Lester Bob Wilcox, 29, of Eunice, Missouri feels Palin connects with him on a personal level: "I heard her say one time that she's all about the 'Joe six-packs' out there. Well, I tell you what Miss Palin, I gotta six pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon back in my trailer. Why don't ya stop by some time, we'll drink some cold ones, and I'll show ya my huntin' rifle collection. Then I'd show ya my OTHER gun - oh yeah, ya know what I'm talkin' about!"
With the election only days away, it remains to be seen whether dudes with mullets will have any impact on the presidential race. "I don't know about that McCain guy, he reminds me of old Henry down over at the Pickins farm. That bastard would shoot at us with his squirrel rifle whenever we'd ride our ATVs over his land," said Joe 'Slim' Johnson, 35, of Monroe, Tennessee. "If it were just McCain runnin', I could care less 'bout this whole thing. But that Sarah Palin is real excitin'. I'm votin' now for sure. Any woman who shoots wolves and goes to NASCAR rallies and has a hot body is my kinda woman."
While Palin's support amongst dudes with mullets is very strong, voter turnout has historically been poor in this core constituency. "My parole officer said I can't vote no more, on account of me being convicted of meth production and all," said Ryan Joe Stone, 39, of Hillsdale, Kentucky. "That's a dang shame that I can't vote fer her. I heard from my cousin Kevin that she's in one of them adult movies made by that guy who runs Hustler. Man, I wanna see that."
1 comment:
Damn I had better shave my mullet. I don't want to be placed in that group. And what the hell is Lester Bob doing on their. That idiot is all about jumping on ANY bandwagon. Short story. I had told him that all the girls down at the Trailer Convention were showing camel toe because Joe the Camel said it was cool. Well, Lester Bob stuffed something down his pants to make it look like he had camel toe. What a fucking idiot he just doesn't get it. And by the way his hunting rifle collection consist of a first generation Nintendo and Duck Hunt. One more thing Fro Master...is there any chance I can get a copy of that adult movie Sarah Palin is in?
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